QUEEN KONG TOMATO

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QUEEN KONG TOMATO

Post  Karen on Wed Aug 26, 2015 9:01 am

Sad for the departure of home-grown tomatoes ...


QUEEN KONG TOMATO

Big red marbles,
burnished black,
ripened on Caroline’s washer.
Cherokee Purple Tomatoes,
she said.
I picked the last
before frost.

The next spring,
Caroline’s gift:
a tiny plant,
started from seed.
Even I
could grow
cherry tomatoes.

The cast iron pot
in the front yard
welcomed the newcomer.
She spread out,
made herself at home,
put down roots.

I never expected
her Jack in the Beanstalk
trunk,
that I propped with a basket
and a lattice
and a broom stick.
Or a tomato
as big as a grapefruit.
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Karen

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Good Fun

Post  tsukany on Fri Aug 28, 2015 6:53 am

Karen

What about moving stanza one to the end of the poem?  Start with stanza two.

Todd
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Re: QUEEN KONG TOMATO

Post  Karen on Fri Aug 28, 2015 7:31 am

I like it!  I still have all the parts I want, but the ending isn't as pat.  It keeps the reader guessing in a different way.
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QUEEN KONG TOMATO

Post  Dewell H. Byrd on Sat Aug 29, 2015 1:17 pm

Love the form you are using with this fruiting vine.  To suddenly personify the plant as late as Stanza three left me guessing during first read.  Should Jack-In-The-Beanstalk have some connectors in there?  I get your message in last two lines but it seems powerless... lost in preceding descriptors...  can you break these lines off someway to give them back the punch, surprise they deserve?  Good poem...  I can smell the vine, taste the tartness... Dewell

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Tomatoes

Post  Pat on Sat Aug 29, 2015 3:13 pm

I like the format:   like a growing tomato.   I like the last line:  it has punch enough for me.  I like knowing it's a huge tomato.  First stanza.  I read and read the poem:   you really don't require first stanza unless you are giving the poem as a gift to Caroline.  It may have helped you get into the mood for the poem?

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Broom sticks and bed springs how do we make our gardens grow

Post  Dennis 20 on Mon Aug 31, 2015 10:31 pm

Karen,  You drew the picture so beautifully.  I could never have said burnished black but that is so accurate on those little doogies.  Bet you can't pronounce that word. (could be dugies since it rhymes with rouge)  I liked that you centered it on the page. It is the little things that sometimes helps to form a poem and we don't even notice.  You wanted the vine-plant to be tall and straight but it wasn't and often they aren't.  You make it so believeable as if you really knew how to grow a vine. And then finished it off to give the title credence with the out-of-place grapefruit.  Good!

Dennis 20
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