The Last Friday

The Last Friday is a poetry editing group. Once a month, we post a poem and then offer feedback to the other poems on the Forum. We're a friendly but honest group. We value each other deeply and desire for every poet to be published or become famous.


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Ekphrasis x 2

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Karen

Posts : 310
Join date : 2014-10-25
Age : 65
Location : North Little Rock

Ekphrasis x 2

Post  Karen on Thu Dec 28, 2017 4:22 pm

I’ve started a collaboration with a visual artist.  What?!  I’m writing in response to her work, and she’s painting in response to my poems.  My words are incorporated into the piece of art.  We’re just getting started.  I wrote this in response to her work.  It so clearly suggested the images in The Second Coming that I was sure it was her original inspiration.

Turns out she’s not familiar with the poem.

This is FUN.  Not the poem, the process.

mere anarchy
     after The Second Coming by William Butler Yeats

bear witness to
the Slouching Beast
be not a witless member
of the feckless fold
you are among the few
allowed to choose
to honor innocence
do not fall back
do not fall back
into the stony sleep
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tsukany

Posts : 619
Join date : 2011-05-21

Connection?

Post  tsukany on Sat Dec 30, 2017 2:20 pm

Karen

I didn't see the connection in the two poems.  Sad  Seems like "mere anarchy" is more abstract than Yeats.

I am missing the connection of the title and the poem in "mere anarchy."

I LOVE the idea you are sharing:  paintings and poetry.  Makes me happy.

Todd

Dewell H. Byrd

Posts : 374
Join date : 2012-01-05
Age : 87
Location : Central Point, OR

mere anarchy

Post  Dewell H. Byrd on Sun Dec 31, 2017 6:17 pm

Title and this poem just don't seem to work together.
And the Yeats line probably should be deleted.
I don't have a better title for you... wish I could see the visual you speak of.
Really like "witless member" and "stony sleep"...

A professional artist did a painting with my "THE DOVE" poem
in the foreground... great idea except she over-reached the poem.
We will try again someday with a different poem.

Thanks for sharing this piece.
Dewell

Pat

Posts : 671
Join date : 2011-09-12

Mere anarchy

Post  Pat on Mon Jan 01, 2018 2:00 pm

Mere anarchy, mere rebellion, mere chaos. Opposites with mere.  Hmmm.  Like mere war.  Sarcasm?
Then, I read:  Stay awake, bear witness.  

I like the poem.  Yes, it reminds me of Revelations.

What is the heart of it?  Be Not Witless???  Stay Awake?  You could name it Warning maybe?

I reread Yeats' poem.  I'd create a new title and not refer to his poem.  

I like the echoes in the poem.  "do not fall back...", the rhymes, alliteration.  Good poetic devices.   
Love that you are collaborating with an artist.  Great!

Pat

Posts : 671
Join date : 2011-09-12

Mere anarchy

Post  Pat on Mon Jan 01, 2018 2:01 pm

Mere anarchy, mere rebellion, mere chaos. Opposites with mere.  Hmmm.  Like mere war.  Sarcasm?
Then, I read:  Stay awake, bear witness.  

I like the poem.  Yes, it reminds me of Revelations.

What is the heart of it?  Be Not Witless???  Stay Awake?  You could name it Warning maybe?

I reread Yeats' poem.  I'd create a new title and not refer to his poem.  

I like the echoes in the poem.  "do not fall back...", the rhymes, alliteration.  Good poetic devices.   
Love that you are collaborating with an artist.  Great!

Pat

Posts : 671
Join date : 2011-09-12

Mere anarchy

Post  Pat on Mon Jan 01, 2018 2:01 pm

Mere anarchy, mere rebellion, mere chaos. Opposites with mere.  Hmmm.  Like mere war.  Sarcasm?
Then, I read:  Stay awake, bear witness.  

I like the poem.  Yes, it reminds me of Revelations.

What is the heart of it?  Be Not Witless???  Stay Awake?  You could name it Warning maybe?

I reread Yeats' poem.  I'd create a new title and not refer to his poem.  

I like the echoes in the poem.  "do not fall back...", the rhymes, alliteration.  Good poetic devices.   
Love that you are collaborating with an artist.  Great!

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