Pat Writes" "I am struggling with the title"

Pat

I take the poem to be a statement that suggests that Quraysh Ali Lansana does NOT hold these values; thus, he is disqualified as a "Role Model."

Did I track correctly?

Todd

And apology may be the wrong word. I think we are good on the technology.
Now, I have to go hang myself!
No worry. Traction for neck.... 

Later, I will try to find his poem.  I like his poem, just not as showy as I want...and I remember not understanding his title at the beginning...??? maybe.  I really liked his format.

Pat

I think now that I was 'inspired' by this poet's poem.  I'm changing it to Inspired by....

I have not yet found the poem that inspired me. Still looking.

Now to go back to your poem....

Here's the poem I liked and modeled after.  


Under my poem, can I say: After Quraysh Ali Lansasa  ????


I think of modeling and bonding as different.


I loved his i at the beginning of lines, the couplets, the examples. I am aware my first line is the same as his. I struggled with another way of saying  : i want my sons to know.  Any ideas....? 


Male Bonding
Quraysh Ali Lansana - 1964-
·       
·       
·       
·       
·       
·   fofor Adrian, J., Christopher, Matthew, Greg, Roger, Major & Randall
i want my sons to know
men who smile
i want my sons to know men
who own their imperfections
i want my sons to know
men who listen
i want my sons to know
men who hear hearts, see words
i want my sons to know men
who honor women
i want my sons to know
men who appreciate the arts
i want my sons to know
men who adore their mamas
i want my sons to know men
who aren’t afraid of tears
i want my sons to know
men who respect their fathers
i want my sons to know men
who use fists in self-defense only
i want my sons to know
men who value and dignify men
men who work hard, can’t
spell quit, understand no
i want my sons to know
men who apologize
i want my sons to know men
who have relations with The Divine
men who question everything
men who know humility
i want my sons to know
men who read books
i want my sons to know men
who laugh at themselves
i want my sons to know
men who see possibility

Role Modeling
 
(Inspired by a poem by Quraysh Ali Lansana)
 
i want my sons to respect men who
tear up at sad movies
 
i want my sons to respect men who
say “no” as well as “yes”
 
i want my sons to respect men who
smile and stroke dogs
 
i want my sons to respect men who
follow boundaries
 
i want my sons to respect men who
admit, “I don’t know”
 
i want my sons to respect men who
ask for forgiveness
 
i want my sons to respect men who
say thoughts and name feelings
 
i want my sons to respect men who
listen to old storytellers
 
i want my sons to respect men who
recognize needs and offer help
 
i want my sons to respect men who
show kindness to mothers
 
i want my sons to respect men who
know God has the better plan

Pat

There is a line or two in the model poem that breaks the couplet format.  I wonder if you can benefit from that detail in your poem.

You have chosen to capitalize "I" in the quote inside the poem.

I like your epigraph now.  You can write "after" rather than inspired.  I didn't finish the article:  https://www.vulture.com/2018/12/poetry-twitter-debates-whether-after-poems-are-plagiarism.html

Todd