The Last Friday

The Last Friday is a poetry editing group. Once a month, we post a poem and then offer feedback to the other poems on the Forum. We're a friendly but honest group. We value each other deeply and desire for every poet to be published or become famous.

    Short and . . . ?


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    Join date : 2011-05-21

    Short and . . . ?

    Post  tsukany on Fri Sep 26, 2014 4:55 pm

    Racism in the Kitchen

    That the white dish soap
    is different than the blue
    is clear to me, now,

    as I rinse out the white
    before re-filling the dispenser
    with the Dawn.

    --Sukany 16 Sept 2014


    ...? Incomplete

    Post  dennis20 on Fri Sep 26, 2014 8:15 pm

    Todd,  You have taken for granted that the reader knows Dawn is blue.  This may have been a wrong assumption thus leading to confusion as to the intent.  This poem can help us see we are prejuice even in trivial matters or this may be a self-punishing way of calling attention to human weaknesses.
    On the other hand, a strong reaction to an innocent choice at the grocery store where they were out of the white soap this week.  An eye opener to the optimist who sees the glass half-full as well as the pessimist who sees it half-empty.  The fatalist will say it was bound to happen anyway.
    Short with provocative thought--good!


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    Join date : 2011-09-12


    Post  Pat on Sat Sep 27, 2014 10:06 am

    I read it and said, "Do what?"   This really pushes me outside the box of normal thought.   I even looked up racism, wondering what the true definition might be.   Well, it was close to what I thought:   superior thinking of self over someone being inferior.   Dove? over Dawn?  or Dawn over Dove?   You don't mix the two?  Someone cares that the two not get mixed.   Well, I have such a dispenser too.   And I too clean out one before adding the other.  Hmmmm.  Why do I do that?   It's all about color, yes, but it is not my thinking one is better than the other.  It is about keeping the white white and the blue, blue.  I don't care if it is white or blue, just the way it looks.  One is as good as the other most likely.   But blue does look better in the dispenser.  I just like colbalt blue.   I agree that they are just different colors like the sky and the grass.  We are just set in our ways and habits, I think, not thinking of the least little wind affecting a ripple of pond, but I guess it does.  The pond still stays in its banks, but the wind did happen and affect the pond.  My world gets so busy and crazy sometimes that I consider this a dime problem, so I just put a dime's worth of energy on it.  Maybe I should put more on it, but I don't.  There are dime problems, then there are hundred dollar problems.   Now, in 1958, the black/white issue merited big energy.   On and on I can go. . . . but I won't. 

    I wonder if you might put "is different" on a line all by itself?  Would that be giving up too much?  Looking for poetics. 

    You certainly made me think hard on a tiny poem.  Congratulations.

    Dewell H. Byrd

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    Racism In The Kitchen

    Post  Dewell H. Byrd on Mon Sep 29, 2014 10:08 am

    That word "racism" in the title is too strong for this poem, says Dewell.
    The poem sure makes me think... and I love the multiple meaning of Dawn... solid ending.
    I would rinse out one color before adding another to avoid mixing conflicting chemicals.
    Rinsing out is also an economic thing for me... get last drops...
    My Dad loved cornbread but only if it was made with white cornmeal.  Yellow corn and cornmeal
    were for the field hands!  At his 96th birthday party he admitted that was kinda ridiculous.
    Back to the poem... makes me think... that is a long, long reach for such a tiny poem.  Dewell

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